Dream

Last night I had a crazy dream. John Anderson died this week. I think I'm dealing with with the pain and sadness in my dreams. Anyway, I dreamed that we were at the funeral and for some reason I could see to the other side of the veil. John was there surrounded by people, Chris, his mom, his dad others that I felt loved us very much and so was Alice. She was wearing a red and white striped shirt. And black pants. She come over to me and we just starred at each other. I couldn't speak or breath. I just stood there not moving starring at her. I was so happy to see her but I was afraid if I moved that she'd disappear again. Everyone on this side of the veil was getting ready to move to the chapel for the funeral, but I just stood there, frozen, not daring to move. People kept taking to me, I could hear their voices starting to get panicky and Alice smiled at me and waved. Tears began to streak down my face. I.knew they needed to go. John walked over to me and Alice. Mom and Pat were standing next to them on this side, unaware of their presence. John gestured to watch out for pat and then he put his arm around Alice and they waved goodbye.

I was so sad to see them go but the love that I could feel from the other side was pure, deep, comforting. I knew Alice loved us, that she d missed us very much. That she was always there watching over us.

She's gone

It's been ten years. Almost eleven. Really is been eleven. I'm starting to forget. It isn't fair. But we all know life isn't fair. She was one of the good ones. One of the great ones. She was my best friend and I took her for granted. I want her back. What I wouldn't give to let Isaac and Lydia and Ruthann get to grow up with her. It just isn't.

Pregnant Mommy

I am so sick. I hate that I feel like I have no one to talk to. It was a li more fun being pregnant with Sarah and Rachel. Then when I felt pukey or cranky or whatever they understood. Now I feel like everyone thinks my pregnancy is already boring and annoying.

Maybe it's just me. Sometimes I feel like I don't know who I am any more.

Who am I?

I'm pregnant!!

I'm so excited to be pregnant. I can't wait to tell everyone but Brandon won't let me until after we buy our house. It's totally awesome though!

Lowe's build and grow

We took Isaac and Lydia to the build and grow at Lowe's this week. They had so much fun!

Totally back on!

Went to Costco. Bought healthy food. Excited to eat it! It's funny, I do like to eat healthy home cooked food. I'm just lazy. It's pathetic. My being lazy is a two edged sword. It's makes me eat fat food and it makes me too lazy to work out. I need motivation!

Horrible

Well I've fallen off the wagon. I need to get some motivation to get back on.

Let's get back to work!!

3 lbs!!!

I'm down 3lbs since I started weight watchers and 7.5lbs since I started dieting. I'm super excited! It's nice to have some success!!! It gives me the ability to keep going!

Not going so well

This whole healthy eating thing is HARD!!! I'm still working on it but sometimes I just had a hard time!!

Happy

I think I've lost about two pounds. This makes me happy. I didn't weigh myself in the same clothes (my swim suit) or at the same time as I normally do so I'm not 100% sure about it.

Strawberry shortcake

I love summer! It is defiantly easier to eat healthy foods in the summer. I always love sitting down to eat a bowl of fresh strawberries for some steamed zucchini!! Yum!

I had ice cream for breakfast at the farmers market. It was Devine, but a lot of points. So for lunch I had a HUGE bowl of strawberries. I'm actually not sure which one was better. So I am happy!

Allergies

I hate allergies. They make everything taste funny. And they make me sick to my stomach because if all the mucus. This makes me only want to eat sugary food because sugar still tastes the same. This makes it hard to eat healthy. But I'm determined to work through it!!

Mother's day

Today was tiring, as church always is when my husband has to work. I usually end up feeling frustrated and inferior. But I was glad to have my husband working. He's working again tomorrow which is awesome, we need the money!

Anyway, I got on here to blog about my food choices. I knew today would be a hard day for me to make good choices, so I planned a lot of vegetables into my meals. I think I did ok. I had a cookie and some chocolates that they handed out at church. Both were devine!!!! Overall I'm happy with the choices I made today. As long as I stick to my points the rest of the week I should be fine!!

The hardest part to this thing is drinking my water. I'm just not thrilled to drink it!

Happy Mother's Day! I loved the pictures I received from my two beautiful children!! I'm so glad to be a Mommy!!

$$$

So I love weight watchers, especially the new points plus program. It's awesome because it's teaching me how to eat healthy. Vegetables are some of my loves, but because my husband doesn't really like them, I've gotten out of the habit of eating them. Sometimes I felt like I didn't deserve to "waste" my money on them because I was the only person in our family who would eat them. I don't know why I would feel that way, I have no problem buying my husband things like pizza pockets, chicken nuggets and any other kind of nasty snacks that I don't like, mostly I HATE them! So why do I feel like its ok for him to have all those unhealthy snacks but it's not ok for me to spend a dollar on some squash or zucchini? Don't get me wrong, my husband has never made me feel this way, he encourages me, he just doesn't partake.

I was listening to the radio the other day and they were talking about why people are obese in America. They were discussing he idea that we need to pass new laws to limit snacks given to children, whether it's from McDonalds or vending machines at schools. They were discussing how for some people they're obese because they can't "afford" to eat healthy. I think that's a total cop out. I you can afford to go but a meal at McDonald then you can afford to go buy something healthy from the grocery store.

I believe the problem with obesity in America lies with us not caring about the poor food choices that we make at every meal. It's easier to take my kids to the drive-thru when they're tired and cranky after playing at the park. It's easier to have my husband pick up a pizza on his way home from work. But with a little planning ahead, those good choices because easier too.

My other theory is that we're just not informed. We haven't taken the time to learn about what is healthy to put into our bodies and what isn't healthy. Fueling our bodies is hard work, and can sometimes be confusing. But the more we learn and work towards being healthy, the better off we are.

Getting America Healthy starts with getting one Mommy at a time healthy. A healthy mom can teach her children healthy habits. Here's to the health of my family. It starts here. It starts now.

Loosing the weight

I'm going to start using this blog to chronicle my weight loss and workout adventure.

In April I jogged/mostly walked a half marathon. This jump started me onto getting my body healthy.

I don't have an issue with my body image. I feel beautiful. I am beautiful. And I'm happy with who I am. Of course I would like to be skinnier, but it's not something I think about on a daily basis or something I even care about.

So I'm not doing this to get skinny. I'm doing this to get healthy. I'm doing this because I want to be an amazing example to my children. I want my kids to understand nutrition and to know how to be healthy. The best person to teach my children this is me, I am their strongest example. If I'm not being healthy, I can never expect my children to be healthy!

I also want to get healthy because I have horrible asthma. I struggle on a daily basis to catch my breath. Sometimes I feel like I can't breath when in just sitting on the couch. I feel that if I loose the 50-70lbs it will be easier to breath. I'm hoping that it will help with my allergies too. But if not, it will still change my life to be healthier.

It's hard to measure my progress without some numbers so I'm going to use those as my stats, but they aren't what matter. They're just a way to quantify my achievements!

Weight: 186.8 lbs
Height: 5'4"
BMI: 31.9

Goals:
Weight: 145 difference of 42lbs
BMI: below 25

Tell about a favorite vacation from your childhood.

During the summer between my first and second school year we drove the motor home across the country. We went everywhere: Las Vegas, Mt. Rushmore, New York City, Swimming in the Atlantic (we swam in a jelly fish school and came out covered in jelly fish stings, not our best idea ever, in that same camp ground we also went swimming in a Lake that later we learned had Alligators), ate lobsters till we were sick in Maine, Nauvoo, Busch Gardens theme parks, Amish Country, and many more places that I can't remember off the top of my head.

When we went to Busch Gardens we went for a couple of days and each or the big kids took turns being in charge of one of the little kids. Alice and I didn't like to be separated so who ever was paired with her usually got stuck with me too! When we were paired with Bruce he flirted with the girl in charge of the magic show so she had us sit in the seat where they always pick their volunteers from so Alice and I got to be in the magic show. We thought he was soooo cool! When it started to rain we thought it was awesome because everyone left the park and the lines were non existent so we went on ride after ride with no lines! It was awesome!

My favorite part of the vacation was when we stayed at a KOA campground for about two weeks while we waited for Dad to fly back from having to go home to work. The staff at the campground was so nice and the life gaurd gave me a huge bag of pound candy the day we left and I cried cause I liked her so much. We would go swimming and mini-golfing nearly everyday and I just loved spending time with my family. Especailly since they didn't have any other friends and I got to be thier tag-a-long and the actually wanted me too (at least thats the way I remember it!)

How many brothers and sisters do you have? Describe them and tell a story about you and each of them.

I have three brothers and three sisters.
Dave, Bruce, Sarah, Rachel, Harlow, and Alice.

Dave - Dave is ten and a half years older then me. He has three kids, Olive, Mikey, and Benny. One Christmas when I was about six, maybe a little older, Alice and I couldn't sleep so we tried waking everyone else up, but only Dave didn't tell us to leave him alone. He took us into the family room and made us each a bed on the floor. Then he put Star Wars in for us to watch and to keep us quite. I don't remember what from the movies but Alice managed to stay up for all three of the movies.

Bruce - Bruce is currently working on making a movie in Florida. It takes place on Easter Island. Bruce has always been into body building and I used to call him my personal roller coaster because he would do push ups with me on his back and I had to try to keep my balance to stay on.

Sarah - Sarah is working with Mom on getting the quilt shop going. Vic and Sarah were married my second year of college in Las Vegas. Bruce and I were the only people other than Elvis to attend the wedding. Afterwards we all road a limo up and down the strip before going out to dinner. After dinner (which we had at about 2:ooAM) I went up to Sarah and Vic's room and slept in their bed. Sarah and Vic came to bed around eleven in the morning and Bruce slept on the floor. So yes, I slept with my sister and her husband on their wedding night and their brother slept on the floor. Good times. Sarah has always been my protector and takes care of me whenever I need something or someone.

Rachel - Rachel was married on St. Patricks Day my ninth grade year in school. I remember the first time I met Mark and I had already decided that I didn't like him because he was taking my sister away. I'm pretty sure that I was mean to him, but I guess he won me over sometime cause I love the guy now! Rachel and Mark have two kids, Bryce and Alice. When Bryce was born I was on the ferry trying to get to the hospital to see his birth, and missed it by only minutes. He was born as we were docking in Edmonds, the hospital is only ten minutes up the road from the terminal. When Bryce was about three months old Harlow got married in Florida. Mark, Rachel, Bryce and I went up two weeks early and went on the church history sites tour. We visited Palmyra and saw the Smith homes, we saw Alvin's grave, and we visited the Whitmer home and loved spending time together. We also went to downtown New York City and Niagara Falls. The trip was awesome and my only complaint was that we had a hard time finding good food!

Harlow - Harlow is four and a half years older then me. He married Katy in 2004 (I think) and she made a wonderful addition to our family. When we were kids I remember always fighting with Harlow to have a turn playing the Nintendo and then deciding a minute into playing that I liked watching him better. When the Nintendo 64 came out we had huge bond tournaments with all his friends. I loved getting to tag along and hang out with them too. We would also round up as many kids and we could and play Capture the Flag until all hours of the night. I wasn't very good but it sure was fun.

Alice - Alice was my best friend my whole life. My friends in school could never figure out why I'd rather hang out with my sister than with them because the never got along with thier siblings, but we loved being together. I remember one summer when Mom had let us go to Las Vegas for the summer and we both got terrible sunburns. All the next day we took turns lather each other in Aloe and rubbing ice on our backs so that they didn't hurt so much. Every night before we would go to sleep Alice would say, "Good night and I'll see you in the morning." and I would say back, "Good night, I'll be wit chu in the morning." I think we got it from a movie when I was about ten. When we'd get treats or candy Alice would always take it all and then give us equal rations for days so that we could enjoy our treat for longer. Alice died on April 29, 2003 six years ago. She was twenty years old.